I love how I seem to be comparing alot of stuff to inanimate objects. Like how I say I'm like a used car, or how I like my boys like my potatos. It's easier and more interesting this way. Plus I'm just naturally retarded.
I thought I might as well talk about one of my friends. The one that seems so close, but we're really quite far. We lie, we cheat and we live, all the while knowing the other does the same. I know her inside out, not her secrets but the way she acts. I can tell her trends, as in the people she likes, what she'll do next, her sarcasm, her words; I can tell it all. She's like my twin, but somehow better and worse in the same way.
I hate how much she pushes people away when she doesn't want them anymore, or the fact that her pride is bigger than her hair. She's left me twice and made a truce twice more to be my friend again, but if she is going to push me away, is there really any point?
Then I did something stupid. I liked the same boy as her, and I went for him even though I knew she wanted him too. When she was in the other room. She was so pained and tired of my shit that she left for almost four months. Not really long, but it's long enough to lose your twin.
It's only now I found out that she liked him more than that, and that I was only in the way. Only in for the game. And it's only now that I think about what pain I caused and how I got in the way. If I wasn't there, would things still be the same? I doubt it, and maybe then things could be better.
It's the only thing I ever regret, but I'm never going to tell her that.
