I have officially been awake for twenty-nine hours and forty minutes.I am dead tired, and my head hurts like a bitch, yet I somehow cannot bring myself to sleep. Maybe the cookies and energy drink are responsible for that, or I'm just an irresponsible teen.
I'm tired of boys and their confusing-ness. And my horrible ability to tell if they like me or not. And my fear of rejection, and my fear of dis-like. Damn all of them.
I've given up on writing. After the whole Kyle thing, I cannot bring myself to write anymore. I know it sounds like a pathetic excuse, but the boy was my inspiration as a whole. I just can't seem to write anymore, it all comes out in mush.
I've had alot of school related stress lately. I technically only have thirteen days of school left altogether. kill me now, but i cannot wait till summer.
I can't wait till next year. I get to move out of this city. I get to leave the drama and the stupid people behind. Don't get me wrong, I will miss alot of people, but I just want to get away. It's what I need most right now. A real break.
I'm about to walk Trish to work. I stayed over all night and we have not slept yet. When we get there I'm eating some chicken nuggets and going to watch the clouds by myself in a park near my house. It's my new hangout, it's where I can be alone.
I spend alot of time staring at the sky. I wish I was a bird, that way I can fly away.
I've given up on education for myself. My only hope is french, and I'm not too keen on a job in that field.
I've never felt so alone in a crowd. But maybe this is how I like it.
